Singing with/out Chris Brown

Traffic was terrible this morning.  The kind of terrible that makes you contemplate calling in to work to let someone know that you're on your way.  But who do you call when you are the person who is supposed to be making sure that everyone else is not running late.  Regardless, there I was in my car singing to all sorts of poppy nonsense when Chris Brown's Forever came on.  I turned the volume in the opposite direction of said singers career (up) and got my sing on

- cue music-

"it's like I've waited my whole life

for this one night - it's gonna be me 

you and the dance floor.....

 Now at this point you are expecting to continue with 

cause we've only got one night

double your pleasure, double your fun

WRONG

 

You see my dears, those were there at one point.  That point was before Chris Brown became known as a wife beater.  Now the parent companies of Double Mint have a huge problem with Chris using their slogan as a part of his song and they've taken it out.  In it's place is nothing!  Well, not entirely nothing but no words to keep you going until you get to the annoyingly repetitive 

 

... and dance 

forever (ever, ever)

forever (ever, ever)

forever (ever, ever)

forever 

So there I was singing and we get to the double your pleasure part and I continued singing and there was nothing.  Nothing but shock and embarrassment.  It was a pain reminiscent of past singing experiences where cruel friends have changed songs while I was in mid melody and totally in the groove.  No longer was my voice hidden behind the real star, I was alone and shamed in my own car! UGH!

I felt mildly redeemed when for no reason at all the song seemed to get cut short by Rihanna's new song S&M.  Take that Chris Brown.  Take it!

 

 

Dear Diary 12/23

My throat hurts from choking down the words that seem to linger on the tip of my tongue. Ready at a moments notice they spit out like venom and leave me with an even more broken sense of being. What started as a small spot has grown to the point of what I fear is no return. I don't want to give into the over whelming feelings of giving up but I'm starting to believe its the only way. These feelings have manifested themselves in to living breathing organisms that breed their own feelings of frustration, rejection, and loathing. I'm drowning. You can see me but you won't even throw me the life preserve because you ....

Wait, what's your reason again?

Yeah I know, but....

Its easy to fall into a mood that's less than desirable for all involved. There is a misleading allure about giving in to its deceptive advances. The really hard part is to step back, take a breath and remember to act the way I want to feel.

Dramamine

Simple Facts
1. I've managed to lock myself out of my computer for over a week
2. Fact # 1 makes me even more grateful for my iPhone
3. I learn in roughly one week whether or not I will be moving to Austin
4. My heart aches for the daily weakening of my creativity due to lack of outlets

**Despite my (temporary) lack of computer access and despite the (temporary) weakening of my creative heart beat, I must say that I'm finding myself, quite often, in a state of pure bliss. Maybe it's my "developing love affair," that's gotten me in such a tizzy - or maybe its remembering that
forever is today

last thought(s)

Quick.

Morning: Wacos with Francie
Am Feeling: snuggly
Am Thought: if its raining I'm sooooo not getting out of bed. (totally wasn't)
Culinary Adventure: Waco - i like to add bacon to everything i try there
Liked: the sunshine and the girl
Loved: the girl i was with and seeing Passion Pit with Lynds
Can't Wait: for Miike Snow on Wednesday
Really Need: to replace my camera cords
Also Really Need: more sleep
PM Feeling(s): crushy
PM Thought(s): There is nothing better than the beginning - and Andrew isn't a puppy. haha

pillow thoughts

I could use a good snuggle right about now. I'm completely drained from the past 3 nights of becoming dangerously close to being able to kiss the sunrise goodnight.
As mentioned in the last posting, I had an entry practically writing itself in my head all day yesterday. Sadly today my thoughts are clouded and I'm hesitant to share my feelings.
I have to close my eyes as I type this because its helping me center my energy on my thoughts. Insert heart moan here. Angus & Julia Stone are lulling me back into a sweet whirlwind of pleasant thoughts from weeknights past.
I think I should end on that.


xo

I'm feeling.....

This past week has been made up of moments that make me want to shut my eyes really tight, hide behind my hands and squeal with delight. I just wanted to share. Sorry no lengthy post today, but the next post that's been writing itself in my head all day will hopefully make up for it.

adieu